What can children NOT break!

Rebekah stomps down the hallway into her room, across the floor, and right on to a crayon. The crayon breaks under her little size 7 boots. Without glancing downward she stomps right on top of an open book, crushing several pages into a wrinkled mess. My first reaction is to shake her and ask her what she thinks she is doing, but I am so dumbfounded by the blatant disregard for her own property that I just stand there with my mouth open. When I finally get my wits about me, I tell her to get off her book, to pick it up off the floor,put it away, and the clean up the broken crayon. These are daily occurences at our house. It pains me to see that at such a young age my children already expect that they will get whatever they want and that if they should break something, there is no question about its being replaced. Where did I go wrong?

I believe my first mistake was buying them what they wanted because I wanted them to have it. It sounds easy to say no but, when your little ones sees something and lets out a squeal of excitement, you can't help but want to see the reaction again. TOY PURCHASED!

Secondly, I come to dread the tantrum that will ensue. Your child asks for a Barbie, horse, make-up, etc and you say no. The lip starts to quiver, then the foot stomps, along with a loud holler, scream, falling in the floor melt-down. Of course, everyone in the store comes to look at you, (I swear to see how you will handle it) while you try to pry your screaming banshee off the floor. Now, if I am simply browsing this is a quick fix, I leave the store. However, if I am grocery shopping and my kids want candy, or Dora cereal, or cookies and I say no, I have to deal with the screaming the rest of the isles. You can't beat your children in or out of public though the temptation arises. So, once again, ITEM PURCHASED.

Lastly, in my dire attempt to keep a clutter free house. I established a rule that with every toy that comes in, a toy has to go out. This seemed like a good idea until my daughter asked for a Dora house. I told her that she had a Barbie castle that she hardly plays with and that she doesn't need another house with loads of furniture. Her response was, "The Barbie castle is broken, we'll just give it to the poor children that don't have any toys." That was the last straw. We immediately sat down and had a talk about our possessions and what we do and do not give away. I told her that it was ok to give away toys that she doesn't use anymore but, they have to be nice, working toys that aren't beat-up, broken, missing pieces, colored on or stained.

The rest of the evening I pondered what I have been teaching my children. I strive for them to have the best toys, clothes, educational opportunities, and one day cars. Have I left something out. Perhaps how to demonstrate gratitude, respect and care for things we have been blessed with, sharing our wealth with those that are in need. This pondering led to more pondering. Have I started teaching them how to control themselves? Control their tempers, how to be gracious, how to build and maintain friendships, how we treat and talk to people? Astounded I sat down and decided that some things needed to change while they were still young enough to mold.

First of all, receiving gifts outside of special occasions will be a rarity. When any gift is received, it will be followed by a thank you card written or drawn by them.

Secondly, before we enter a store, I establish with them what we are going to buy and let them know that toys and candy are not an option so, do not ask.

Disregard of property will warant loosing the opportunity to play with that item for a pre-determined amount of time.

My mind still boggles when I think of all the other things that I need to teach them. Perhaps I will share as we tackle the issues. Parenting is so much fun but so much is like a chess game. You don't want to make a move too early, but if you wait too late, you loose the game.