Dealing with Fear

Fear is one of the most paralyzing things that influence a person's life. I have had my battle with this emotion off and on for the past 10 years. Fear of leaving home, fear of not passing tech school, fear of not being able to learn my new job, fear of getting married, fear of deploying to the desert, fear of being pregnant, fear of giving birth, fear of being deployed again, fear of SIDS, fear of my baby choking, fear of them falling, fear of them drowning, etc the cycle never stops. After much prayer I have started to win the battle again. Now, fear rears its ugly head again. A couple weeks ago I started bleeding, and for anyone 12 weeks pregnant that is a bad thing. I tried to maintain composure, tried not to fear what could be happening. I went to the doctor and happily found out that the baby was fine. However, my placenta was attaching itself to my cervix...bad. I was put on bed rest and told to take it easy or I would wind up in the hospital. So, I battled with fear again. I was scared of almost everything because the most simple thing like walking around the house would start the bleeding again. I did spend time in prayer and instead of God telling me that I would be healed, He opened my eyes to the opportunity that laid in front of me. I am able for almost 4 weeks to spend everyday with my girls. They don't have to go to preschool, they get to stay with me. We love it. We have breakfast together, do color pages together and then I watch them while they play. I've never had the opportunity to have this much uninterrupted time with them. I don't know what the future holds for our family, but right now I don't think about it. I enjoy the day I have with my girls and take advantage of loving them!

Life Happenings

This past Tuesday my husband re-enlisted for another 4 years in the military, this will take him to 19 years. WOW! In 6 years he will be eligible for retirement. YAY! I still have 10 years left, bummer. Anyway, here are a couple pictures of the re-enlistment. Rob was re-enlisted by LtCol Ricky Wyatt, his boss.

Pics are here!!

Ladies and gentlemen,

The pics are here of Grand Canaria! Despite a stomach virus that lasted several days, I had a wonderful time. The weater was in the high 70s so of course that meant, bathing suit weather!!

This first picture was taken in a touristy village about 15 minutes from our hotel. It was most beautiful and bordered the ocean.

This second picture was taken at the same village in front of the harbor! The water was amazing. Crystal clear, I hated myself for not having the forethought to bring a change of clothes. I would have jumped in sure as the world is round. Gorgeous!!

My third picture is of the water!! I couldn't leave you not knowing how beautiful water can be. Honestly, despite the rocks, wouldn't you want to jump in?

Ok, normally I don't go around grabbing people's rears. Unless of course it is my husband who I find irresistable at times, or my own if my wallowing in self-pity over my weight, or one of my two daughters. Usually then it's not a grab but a smack or a pinch if we're playing. I can't claim drunken debauchery either because it was 1000 in the morning. Anyway, the onlookers found it funny and despite the language barrier, they knew understood what I was doing and let loose with a hearty laugh. Would I do it again??? uh, yeah!

This is a picture of our crazy German driver, Peter. He is a fellow crew member who runs the radar on the AWACS. He has been stationed at Geilenkirchen for 24 years. Our trip started out rough as, like a lot of German males, he tried the intimidation when we met. If you know me, you know that doesn't work and it was abruptly thrown full force back in his face. By the end of the trip we got along jovily and agreed to fly again together.

Here is a picture of the a town from a couple miles away. We were starting our journey up into the mountains. Grand Canaria use to be an active volcano and is now extinct, hence the very rough terrain.

Here is proof that there are aliens among us. Actually, we found a spot where TOO much alcohol had been consumed. The ground was littered with broken bear bottles and shotgun shells. So, redneck doesn't only apply to the stereotyped backwoods American. But also to Spaniards!

Here is me being free! Yes, I did observe that my pants had come unzipped but, since I'm not showing anything of real importance I posted this pic anyway!!

Here is me posing on an overlook. It was about a 7 story drop from where I was sitting and though you can't tell in the picture, my hands were sweating and my feet hurt because I'm scared of heights!!

Here is the pool behind our hotel where we spent most of our free time. Very pretty! Yes, I do know the guy in the picture, he was too lazy to move.

Here is an interesting picture! Notice the huge crack in the rock?
Here is a sample of the local flora!! Very nice.

Grand Canarias

Lead on O' King Eternal, the Day of March has come!!!

Hello to everyone in the regular world today! I'm enjoying the beautiful Grand Canarias today! We are staying in a beautiful hotel right on the coast! Suprisingly, the island is lacking in beauty. Being nothing but an extinct volcano, the landscape leaves something to be desired. Grand Canarias is very mountainous in areas, and no trees, (except palm and bananas). Bananas is the only export of this small island and the major industry is tourism. The one exceptional beauty is the water. I swear, there is a undiscovered shade of blue here in the water. So, clear, yet so blue!! The beaches are black sand, instead of the revered white. Still, it brings its own charm, beauty that sprung out of destruction. You can visit the actual vocanic sight. A large crater sits in Las Palmas. It has already been overgrown with vegetation. Mostly shrubbery that you would picture in a desert environment. Sitting close to the equator, Grand Canarias has a stable climate of around 70 degrees F. It does vary, but even in Feb/Mar, I'm wearing shorts and a tank top comfortably.
So, aside from the island what have I done. The first night we (my crew) stayed out to 4am. Enjoying the ocean, the food and the some, (the alcohol). It's amazing on a crew like this the camraderie that ensues. We layed out on the beach and tried to identify constellations. Some went for a swim. I did not as, I don't particularly care for water.
Around 4am we headed back to the hotel. Where several crew members decided to strip down to their skivvies and jump in the pool. I was being harassed sorely for being a stick in the mud the whole night. I fear water so I try to stay away. However, a burly Canadian decided that I needed a swim. Now, don't worry, clothes were left in tact. However, in one swift motion I was over his shoulder and as he says, "politely escorted" into the water. I wasn't angry, I knew I had it coming. What I didn't expect was for the security guard coming up rather abruptly and watch as we all crawled out of the pool apologetically. He took room numbers and sent us on our way. I trying to be the smart alec gave him the room number to our crew's pilot. How he figured out that that wasn't my room number I don't know. The next day, however, I had a 75 euro miscellaneous charge on my room.
Yesterday we toured the entire island, lots of driving and pictures. Unfortunately, I left my camera USB cable at home so you will have to wait a week to see pictures!! Today, after I finish my way too expensive coffee, I'm going to the beach!! Enjoy one and all. I will post later. Please forgive all misspelled words and gramatical errors as I'm typing rather fast and will not be checking over it until later in the day!! Love to all that read this!

From the Mouth of Babes

Sayings from my daughters,

"Mom, there's sumthang wrong with my eye, (she holds her eye open) I think theres blood in it or maybe spiders." - Hannah

"Momma, I think my neck is trying to break" - Hannah

(After shutting her finger in her dresser drawer) "Momma, my finger hurts, I think my finger is gonna live" - Hannah

"Momma, I peed inda floor" - Rebekah

"My turn!" - Rebekah

"Momma, I got you a favor, some flowers for your Barbie" - Hannah

"You shouldn't poop in the floor Bekah, that's not nice" - Hannah

(After being told that I have a severe headache) "Aw, your head is hurts mommy, want me to get some cold water for your head," - Hannah

Travels - Bastogne

The first of our travels that I will talk about is our trip to Bastogne. We ventured here a couple of months ago on a freezing cold morning! We arrived when it was still dark out and made our way to the crowd of people. Bastogne is known for the imfamous "Battle of the Bulge" and was also made famous by the series, "Band of Brothers." We were lucky enough to have one of the actual Band of Brothers join us on this walk of remembrance. Our family did the short tour of only 5K. Though only 3.1 miles or so it was bitterly cold and snowing. Along the way, re-enactments of how the troops lived, and the clothes that they had or (didn't have) to keep warm were demonstrated. IT was said that many sleepless nights were spent in these areas due to the bitter cold causing the resin in the trees to freeze and subsequently, the tree would explode. This sounded much like gun fire.

Halfway through we had a stop for hot chocolate, this was a welcome treat for the girls who were suffering from painful fingers and toes. Here I must put in a bit of praise for my two daughters. They made it though 1.5 miles of crowded cold before the cold got to be too much for them. Rebekah was in the stroller and despite having a heavy coat, two pairs of pants, gloves and a blanket wrapped around her, she was frozen stiff. Hannah walked a good part of the way and after the hot chocolate treat, she was wore out and had to be carried on daddy's back. After the long walk was over we ventured into the small town of Bastogne and stopped at a local Baguetterie to warm up and procure some type of nourishment. The girls had about 45 minutes to thaw out and their spirits rose as did the reddness did in their cheeks. After our quick stop we toured the town.

All throughout the day we continued to see the re-enactment players driving around the time blending in the rest of the populous as if they had always been there and always lived that way.

In the next picture you will see that a cool picture I took totally by accident. We were about to cross the road when a soldier drove by and looked at me, I simply lifted my camera and snapped a picture of him. Suprisingly the picture turned out ok, especially considering I was still in landscrape mode!!

Last of all is the excursion to the actual memorial. This was the most memorable of all. It was simply breath-taking and had spiral staircases that you could climb up to the roof and you could see over all of Belgium, for miles! It was the most beautiful sight I saw in all of Belgium! Next year we intend to return to that the 20K hike. Hopefully, a babysitter will be available so that we can continue without torturing our daughters.

Pressing toward 100

2009 brings about new stretches for me!! I will push the envelope on my ability to juggle work, family, and free time. This year I will strive to read 100 books!! Can you believe that 100! That's like two a week or 1 every 3.65 days. The Bible doesn't count as 66 books, (I did ask). I decided to undertake this challenge at the insistence of my younger sister, who is a book worm in every way. I love her dearly and therefore decided to accept her challenge. PLEASE! PLEASE! feel free to offer suggestions on books to read and send some my way that you can part with temporarily! As this could get expensive. LA LA!