A baby story

I have been a mother of three for six days now. I am loving every minute of it. Here is my labor story for anyone who would like to hear it.

I went to the hospital on the 24th, Tuesday, at 0800 to be induced. However, due to a tidal wave of pregnant women needing to deliver they had no room for me. They gave me a room on the gynecology floor until a labor and delivery room opened up. Rob and I sat there until 1030 when a room became available. We went to the labor room where I changed into my hospital gown and got in the bed. My midwife came in and introduced herself. To my relief, she spoke fluent English. She got my IV of Pitocin hooked up and told me that she would come back every 30 minutes to up the dosage. The contractions started almost immediately though I couldn't feel them. Rob and I chatted and shared a chocolate chip cookie while we waited. The nurse came in at the 30 minute mark and increased the Pitocin. I started to feel the contractions within 5 minutes but they were mild. By the end of that 30 minutes they were dying down. The midwife increased the Pitocin again and the contractions felt strong and were starting to come at regular intervals. At the two hour mark, the midwife came and was pleased with the rythym of contractions and decided to check me to see if I was dialating. The moment she started checking me, my water broke. It suprised her and made all of us laugh. My water has a tendency of breaking rather forcefully and it has caused a laughing matter at all three births. The midwife said I was still only dialated to a two. She didn't change the level of Pitocin since my water broke and she wanted to see if my body would go on its own. I remember rolling over, looking at Rob and saying, I don't think we will make our 4 hour goal for delivery. I didn't complete my sentence when I had a severe contraction. I looked at Rob and said, "Nevermind, I need help, go tell the midwife I want the epidural." Rob went to find the midwife and he walked back in and said, "She is with someone else and will be here in a minute." Meanwhile, the afternoon shift midwife came in and asked if I was ok. I had started to cry because I was in a significant amount of discomfort. She asked me if I was in pain and I said yes. Rob told her that the other midwife had checked me and my water had broken. We also told her that I was dialated to a two. She seemed confused when I told her that it had only been 25 minutes ago that this had happened. "Are you really in that much pain?" she asked. I wanted to be a smart alec and give a rude answer but, I was able to maintain a civil demeanor. She decided to check me again. I had dialated to a six. She told me gently that there simply wasn't going to be time for an epidural, but that she would help me have the baby.

I didn't want to believe her. I was scared to death to have a baby without the pain medicine. I also suffer with alot of pride and didn't want to make a fool of myself screaming. I did cry, I allowed myself that in between breathing. I was suprised at how much back pain there was. The midwife suggested that I sit on my knees and rest my weight on the headboard. This did help in shifting the pain from my back to my front. The midwife rubbed my back while Rob held my hand. I stayed in this position until I felt like I needed to push. I then turned back around started trying to push. It took a couple of tries before I gave a real push, because pushing is also painful. Finally, the baby was far enough down that I had an almost uncontrollable desire to push. Here the midwife and I started to disagree. She was telling me little pushes and I was ignoring her. She informed me that the baby's head was catching on a lip of skin and that she needed to give me a muscle relaxer so that I wouldn't rip. To be honest, I don't know if she gave me the relaxer or if I listened to her about slowing the pushing. I do remember feeling a burning sensation and then he was born. We beat our last delivery time by 30 minutes. 3 1/2 hours start to finish. I did scream twice while I was pushing. Not a fearful out of control scream, but more like a scream or yell you would hear in a gym when someone is trying to lift alot of weight. I didn't yell at anyone or get mean. I did end up ripping and needing 4 stitches. That was also uncomfortable since the doctor didn't wait until the anestesia kicked in before stitching. Oh well! Placenta was not to bad. The midwife was tugging on it which was a wierd sensation but, she did very little and it came out. That felt like a bad contraction.

Matthew was placed on my tummy and Rob got to cut the cord. They didn't use any eye ointment on Matthew, and vitamin K was given orally. I got to nurse Matthew almost immediately. They gave us about two hours alone before the midwife took him to clean him a bit and take his weight and such. I really liked that. With my other two, I felt like I was attacked by a herd of nurses and my babies and Rob were escorted out and I was left there babyless.

All in all, it was a good experience. I don't know if I would voluntarily deliver naturally if I got pregnant again but, there were several aspects that I did enjoy more than having the epidural. With the epidural they give you a drug prior, Demerol I believe, this makes you feel drunk. I was so loopy that I wasn't cognizant of what was going on. I participated in this birth alot more. I got to see him be born and I actually got to see the placenta and ask all the questions that I have always wanted to ask but was always to drugged up to ask. I also enjoyed being able to get up and move around during labor instead of being confined to the bed. Last of all, with the epidural I had to have a catheter in for several hours. This time, I didn't.

So, I have experienced delivery both ways. Both ways are equally exhausting. Both have their perks and disadvantages. I would never criticize anyone for choosing to deliver either way. I would encourage women that want to try to deliver naturally to give it a try. Fear, is the biggest set back for alot of people. I won't lie, it is painful but it is also manageable.

Last doctor's visit

Today I had another doctor visit and it was different. First of all, there was no lab work. The nurses hooked me up to the fetal monitor for half an hour but, the machine kept loosing the heart rate. I repositioned several times before I found a posititon that picked up a strong heart beat. I went to the waiting room and the doctor came in shortly after and threw his hands up in the air in a childish manner and said, "Mrs. Young, you still aren't having contractions!" I told him that I knew that but what could I do? He put his arm around me and walked me to his office and said, "Lets see if there is any progress with your cervix." Unfortunately, there had been no progress. I was bummed but, no big deal I wasn't due until next Friday. Still, my doctor seemed unhappy with this. He asked me how labor had progressed with my other two children. I told him that I had been induced with my previous two because my doctor was going on holiday. He just stood there and looked at me for like 10 seconds. I didn't know what to think and then he said, "We can try next week if you want to." So, I said sure. He asked me how I had been induced with the other two. He wanted to know if the doctor had given me a pill. I told him that I was given an IV of pitocin (sp?) and the doctor broke my water. He wanted to know how long it took for me to deliver. My response was 4 hours start to finish. So, he seemed happy. He then said that he was hoping I would go into labor this weekend so that he wouldn't have to induce me. This whole afternoon confused me. Dr. Kaschel has a strict policy about inducing. In fact, my friend who is 3 days past due hasn't been induced yet. I don't know why he decided to do so with me. Anyway, I'm happy!!

Another Dr. appointment

Today's doctors appointment was nothing exciting. I did the standard blood work and urine test followed by reclining on a couch while they monitored the baby's heartbeat for 30 minutes. After this was over, I got to see the doctor. He asked if I was having contractions and I told him I was. Apparently, they showed up on the printout of the heart monitor because he pointed them out. I got an ultrasound which is growing more and more uncomfortable. Matthew is so big now, you can't really tell what is what anymore. They measured his head, tummy, and femur. The doctor guesstimated that he weighed 7lbs. I had a pelvic exam next and he said that I had dialated more since my last appointment. He didn't tell me in Centimeters so, I'm not sure how many, I am assuming 2cm. So, more waiting. I have another appointment on Monday.

Today's Doctor Appointment

Another appointment down, just a few more to go. I went to my doctor's office today and for the first time since I found out I was pregnant, I didn't have to do bloodwork. YAY! One of the things different about delivering in Germany is that they require lab work every single appointment. Having a urine test is normal but they also require blood work every appointment. However, this week was an exception, only a urine sample was required. I checked in and went and sat in the waiting room where I browsed through German magazines and sipped sparkling water, ugh. The nurse called me back and did weight and blood pressure then I had to lie down for 30 minutes while they monitor the baby's heart beat. This could be an enjoyable time except for the machine sounds more like a goose honking than it does a heartbeat. After this was over, I returned to the weighting room for about 10 minutes until Dr. Kaschel called me back. Here is another instance that is unique to my German experience with OB doctors. I go in the doctor's office and sit down and he asks questions and chats, very personable, nothing is rushed. I side-step a bit to tell you about my very first appointment. I met the doctor and he invited me into his office and proceeded to tell me why he liked being a doctor and why he liked delivering babies. This doctor I have also seen climb on a table and beat a printer that was jammed. As you see, this is not typical doctor behavior. For those that have babies, you know your first appointment usual entails a pelvic exam. Regardless of how many of these you have, they never become "second nature" or easy or something you don't dread. However, my first appointment when I got into position which, is a chair in germany not a table, he looked at me and asked, "Have you ever been to Mount Kilimanjaro?" Needless to say it was a good distraction. Anyway, I digress. He asked me how I was feeling, if I was tired, if I was having contractions, any bleeding, etc. Then he tells me to get ready for my pelvic exam. He has a closet-like space in his office that opens into the exam room. The closet space is for you to take your clothes off. Being use to dealing with Americans, whom Europeans say are rediculously modest, he provides a towel to wrap around your waste so that you don't have to parade out naked. Here is another difference between German and American OBs. You get a pelvic exam every single appointment. He told me today that my cervix was starting to open so make sure that I call him immediately if I should start with contractions since I am about 4 weeks from my due date. The only other difference in today's appointment is that I didn't get an ultrasound. Once again, unlike the US, we have ultrasounds every single appointment. All I can say is that German doctors are either very thorough or, they are gouging Tricare for everything they can. Anyway, that was my appointment today. Everything is good with the mild exception of already starting to dilate. His guesstimate is about 2 more weeks. We will see what it brings...maybe a baby!

Dealing with Fear

Fear is one of the most paralyzing things that influence a person's life. I have had my battle with this emotion off and on for the past 10 years. Fear of leaving home, fear of not passing tech school, fear of not being able to learn my new job, fear of getting married, fear of deploying to the desert, fear of being pregnant, fear of giving birth, fear of being deployed again, fear of SIDS, fear of my baby choking, fear of them falling, fear of them drowning, etc the cycle never stops. After much prayer I have started to win the battle again. Now, fear rears its ugly head again. A couple weeks ago I started bleeding, and for anyone 12 weeks pregnant that is a bad thing. I tried to maintain composure, tried not to fear what could be happening. I went to the doctor and happily found out that the baby was fine. However, my placenta was attaching itself to my cervix...bad. I was put on bed rest and told to take it easy or I would wind up in the hospital. So, I battled with fear again. I was scared of almost everything because the most simple thing like walking around the house would start the bleeding again. I did spend time in prayer and instead of God telling me that I would be healed, He opened my eyes to the opportunity that laid in front of me. I am able for almost 4 weeks to spend everyday with my girls. They don't have to go to preschool, they get to stay with me. We love it. We have breakfast together, do color pages together and then I watch them while they play. I've never had the opportunity to have this much uninterrupted time with them. I don't know what the future holds for our family, but right now I don't think about it. I enjoy the day I have with my girls and take advantage of loving them!